Sabaitide
March 2022
Contents
Introduction
The Season Finale
Playlist
I Miss You
Creative
Finding My Voice
Article
A Heartbreaking Loss (I am Not Okay)
Unpopular Opinion
"Anti-racism" needs to include Stop Asian Hate &
"Social Justice" needs to address student debt
Chapter Ten
I'm Done With College
Unpopular Opinion
In Defense of Neil Young
Personal
Antisocial Media
New Addition
Resources
Gratitude
To End on a Happy Note
Introduction
The Season Finale
*Spoiler Alert. I recently watched Matrix Resurrections, and besides all the Keanu ass-kicking and glamorized gun violence, I left the theater wondering what the hidden message of the movie really was. The Matrix depicts our ordinary world as a programmable digital reality where everything that we think we know is not actually the real world. Matrix Resurrections begins in an alternate reality where Keanu Reeves is an award winning video game programmer of, ironically, The Matrix, and he has PTSD from the original Matrix trilogy. Like if The Matrix was just a game or a dream, why did it feel like a memory to him? It wasn’t just Tom Anderson in this Matrix. I saw the real Keanu Reeves expressing relatable anxieties about maybe not being how he used to be or how people think he is. Keanu is seemingly stuck in an alternate reality where he is not truly himself, until the story unfolds.
Keanu’s onscreen performance prompted me to think about a few things: who am I really and what is my purpose here, is there more to reality and how can I exit the Matrix, and do I have a soulmate, or did I already meet my soulmate and completely mess it up? And now, here I am, another year closer to being 30, socially cursed in an alternate reality where I am so painfully awkward and not at my greatest potential, yet I'm still very blessed to be exactly how I am. Like Keanu, I feel that these questions can no longer be ignored and that my true calling isn't necessarily here. I feel on the edge of my reality and I'm wondering what that means. So, I’m not okay right now. One, I watched the new Matrix, two, I just dropped out of college, and three, I regret starting a blog during all of this.
I started this blog when I began graduate school to capture the creative process of writing a book, but here we are, ten months later, and I just dropped out. You know, I didn’t know how this was going to end, but that sounds about right. Or, I can think of it this way, I finished college in ten months! I must be too dang brilliant. To be honest, I'm still emotionally processing that huge high and low and I feel a little upset right now. I feel so disappointed in the school I attended because I was willing to complete the entire MFA program, but I just dropped out because I don't agree with their approaches to "anti-racism" and "social justice" and I am not willing to spend the rest of my life paying off a student loan if they preach race, gender, and orientation yet still ignore the need to Stop Asian Hate. There's nothing new under the sun and pursuing a master's degree at this time would just be striving after wind, and so, I made the right decision. I think it was Morpheus who said that, the choice is an illusion because you already know what to do.
My pieces this month will speak for themselves about why I dropped out, and I don't mean to make anyone else sad, but hopefully you can see the bigger picture. I sure hope that there's more to the Matrix that we're all in because I feel like this reality is going to get more depressing. It also doesn't help that world events have been even more hellish this last week with the Russian invasion in Ukraine and a chain of reactions that will only unfold into a greater crisis. The attacks have already flipped Ukraine upside-down, claimed too many lives, put millions more in harms way, and it also threatens democracy. I'm already upset and I STRONGLY DISAGREE WITH RUSSIA'S WAR or any war for that matter. I don't know what the near future will look like, but just be careful and mindful of your mental health while checking the news or social media. I was just shown a bunch of ads for artillery and panties while checking the news and I'm not even like that. The media is worse and these freaking ads are the real enemy.
No one can really be told what the Matrix is. You have to see it for yourself, but seriously, don't depend on me to show you what it is. I'm a creative writer. I was bound to have a mental breakdown at some point. This is it.
This is the season finale of my blog. Stay free.
Keanu’s onscreen performance prompted me to think about a few things: who am I really and what is my purpose here, is there more to reality and how can I exit the Matrix, and do I have a soulmate, or did I already meet my soulmate and completely mess it up? And now, here I am, another year closer to being 30, socially cursed in an alternate reality where I am so painfully awkward and not at my greatest potential, yet I'm still very blessed to be exactly how I am. Like Keanu, I feel that these questions can no longer be ignored and that my true calling isn't necessarily here. I feel on the edge of my reality and I'm wondering what that means. So, I’m not okay right now. One, I watched the new Matrix, two, I just dropped out of college, and three, I regret starting a blog during all of this.
I started this blog when I began graduate school to capture the creative process of writing a book, but here we are, ten months later, and I just dropped out. You know, I didn’t know how this was going to end, but that sounds about right. Or, I can think of it this way, I finished college in ten months! I must be too dang brilliant. To be honest, I'm still emotionally processing that huge high and low and I feel a little upset right now. I feel so disappointed in the school I attended because I was willing to complete the entire MFA program, but I just dropped out because I don't agree with their approaches to "anti-racism" and "social justice" and I am not willing to spend the rest of my life paying off a student loan if they preach race, gender, and orientation yet still ignore the need to Stop Asian Hate. There's nothing new under the sun and pursuing a master's degree at this time would just be striving after wind, and so, I made the right decision. I think it was Morpheus who said that, the choice is an illusion because you already know what to do.
My pieces this month will speak for themselves about why I dropped out, and I don't mean to make anyone else sad, but hopefully you can see the bigger picture. I sure hope that there's more to the Matrix that we're all in because I feel like this reality is going to get more depressing. It also doesn't help that world events have been even more hellish this last week with the Russian invasion in Ukraine and a chain of reactions that will only unfold into a greater crisis. The attacks have already flipped Ukraine upside-down, claimed too many lives, put millions more in harms way, and it also threatens democracy. I'm already upset and I STRONGLY DISAGREE WITH RUSSIA'S WAR or any war for that matter. I don't know what the near future will look like, but just be careful and mindful of your mental health while checking the news or social media. I was just shown a bunch of ads for artillery and panties while checking the news and I'm not even like that. The media is worse and these freaking ads are the real enemy.
No one can really be told what the Matrix is. You have to see it for yourself, but seriously, don't depend on me to show you what it is. I'm a creative writer. I was bound to have a mental breakdown at some point. This is it.
This is the season finale of my blog. Stay free.
Playlist
I Miss You
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I Miss You - Blink 182
Creative
Finding My Voice
What could I say
What could I do
To possibly change
Your point of view?
You can’t change mine
I might change yours
I can open my mind
While you all observe
I found my voice
I might be heard
But am I surprised
That I feel ignored?
What could I do
To possibly change
Your point of view?
You can’t change mine
I might change yours
I can open my mind
While you all observe
I found my voice
I might be heard
But am I surprised
That I feel ignored?
Article
A Heartbreaking Loss (I Am Not Okay)
A follow up to another article on #StopAsianHate called, “A Different Kind of Sad” published in Overachiever Magazine
The week after Valentine’s Day has been a sad one following the news about what happened to Christina Yuna Lee, and for those who knew and loved her personally, I’m so sorry for your heartbreaking loss. I read that Christina was followed home and was stabbed to death by a man named Assamad Nash, and every time I read it, I couldn’t help but feel like I read my own obituary and it was terrifying to read every single time. Christina was so sweet and creative. She didn’t deserve to go! She reminds me of one of my best friends, I see a part of myself in her, and even as someone who did not know her personally, I have not been okay since I read the news.
The New York Post wrote, “Last Sunday, right in Chinatown, a young Asian woman named Christina Yuna Lee was followed home and stabbed to death. Weeks earlier, Michelle Alyssa Go, also Asian, was deliberately pushed into a subway train and killed. Before that, Yao Pan Ma, an Asian man, died months after being stomped on while collecting cans…There are clear cases of Asian hate, which all people of good conscience actively oppose. And while Ma’s killer was charged with a hate crime, these three murders should terrify New Yorkers of every race. Because these victims could have been anyone” (New York Post).
There’s more to this and race is not the only issue, but race is the first thing we usually see. As The Post noted, the victims could have been anyone. However, violence against Asian Americans has been happening more often, and frighteningly, with more severity. Christina’s murder amplified the demand to Stop Asian Hate, and rightfully so. The violence against Asian Americans should be addressed, but not politicized.
The New York Post wrote in another article that, “White House press secretary Jen Psaki did it again, this time blaming the rise in anti-Asian hate crimes on ‘the hate-filled rhetoric and language around the origins of the pandemic’ — meaning, of course, it’s Trump’s fault again. The absurdity is obvious since the prompt for Psaki’s gaslighting was Sunday’s slaying of Christina Yuna Lee in Manhattan. Caught at the scene was homeless career criminal Assamad Nash. This follows last month’s fatal subway-shoving of Michelle Alyssa Go by another drifter, also suffering serious mental illness. Neither perp fits the core ‘listens to Donald Trump’ demographic, to put it mildly” (New York Post).
The online mediasphere is broadcasting Stop Asian Hate because it’s usually about your race when you’re a minority, but becoming the targets of violence is not the kind of representation any community wants. The violence against Asian Americans should be addressed, but so should mental health, homelessness, drug abuse, and violence. Why is it that when all of those factors play into crime, it’s race that gets highlighted in the media, but when my university sends emails about “anti-racism” and “social justice,” they cannot even address the recent violence against Asian Americans?
I have not been okay, and so when I got another school email about “anti-racism” that didn’t even mention violence against Asian Americans, this time I actually responded.
The week after Valentine’s Day has been a sad one following the news about what happened to Christina Yuna Lee, and for those who knew and loved her personally, I’m so sorry for your heartbreaking loss. I read that Christina was followed home and was stabbed to death by a man named Assamad Nash, and every time I read it, I couldn’t help but feel like I read my own obituary and it was terrifying to read every single time. Christina was so sweet and creative. She didn’t deserve to go! She reminds me of one of my best friends, I see a part of myself in her, and even as someone who did not know her personally, I have not been okay since I read the news.
The New York Post wrote, “Last Sunday, right in Chinatown, a young Asian woman named Christina Yuna Lee was followed home and stabbed to death. Weeks earlier, Michelle Alyssa Go, also Asian, was deliberately pushed into a subway train and killed. Before that, Yao Pan Ma, an Asian man, died months after being stomped on while collecting cans…There are clear cases of Asian hate, which all people of good conscience actively oppose. And while Ma’s killer was charged with a hate crime, these three murders should terrify New Yorkers of every race. Because these victims could have been anyone” (New York Post).
There’s more to this and race is not the only issue, but race is the first thing we usually see. As The Post noted, the victims could have been anyone. However, violence against Asian Americans has been happening more often, and frighteningly, with more severity. Christina’s murder amplified the demand to Stop Asian Hate, and rightfully so. The violence against Asian Americans should be addressed, but not politicized.
The New York Post wrote in another article that, “White House press secretary Jen Psaki did it again, this time blaming the rise in anti-Asian hate crimes on ‘the hate-filled rhetoric and language around the origins of the pandemic’ — meaning, of course, it’s Trump’s fault again. The absurdity is obvious since the prompt for Psaki’s gaslighting was Sunday’s slaying of Christina Yuna Lee in Manhattan. Caught at the scene was homeless career criminal Assamad Nash. This follows last month’s fatal subway-shoving of Michelle Alyssa Go by another drifter, also suffering serious mental illness. Neither perp fits the core ‘listens to Donald Trump’ demographic, to put it mildly” (New York Post).
The online mediasphere is broadcasting Stop Asian Hate because it’s usually about your race when you’re a minority, but becoming the targets of violence is not the kind of representation any community wants. The violence against Asian Americans should be addressed, but so should mental health, homelessness, drug abuse, and violence. Why is it that when all of those factors play into crime, it’s race that gets highlighted in the media, but when my university sends emails about “anti-racism” and “social justice,” they cannot even address the recent violence against Asian Americans?
I have not been okay, and so when I got another school email about “anti-racism” that didn’t even mention violence against Asian Americans, this time I actually responded.
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I have a few thoughts on “anti-racism” and “social justice” that I do not feel are being addressed, but if you asked me, I’d also not know how to fully express them to you. Why was attention drawn to Lunar New Year being the reason to postpone an “anti-racism” meeting, but after the very sad news of Christina Yuna Lee’s murder on February 13th, the impact of her to the AAPI community wasn’t at all addressed in the anti-racism email on February 14th. If this was in fact addressed in the Monday zoom meeting, then I completely missed it, but that’s just my impression.
The words “social justice” and “white allyship” are a complete turn off, and to me, distinguishing people by their social identifiers (gender, race, orientation) is not the best approach to celebrate or teach diversity. I’m sad and these “anti-racism” emails aren’t enough to address the real issue, and right now, we should address that hate is not okay. I cannot change the fact that I’m Asian, and when people say that they are allies or that they “support of our AAPI friends & neighbors,” I honestly don’t know how to respond. Thanks? I know you mean well, but I’m not okay right now. Again, I’m not sure if I can fully express how I feel on this topic. Kindly |
I seriously need to calm down, but this time I won’t apologize for how I feel. If a university’s "social justice" initiative seems to be all about race, gender, and orientation, it completely undermines the bigger social injustice and does not actually equip the next generation to realize that cold blood murder can happen to anyone, and I simply cannot afford to attend a 45k “safe space.” Violence is a complex issue, but it’s always race that gets highlighted, and the fact that the university has an “anti-racism” task force that does not actually address the recent violence against Asian Americans just hurts.
Again, I am not okay. I just read my own obituary when I read about Christina Yuna Lee’s murder and I can’t count on the university, the media, or the system to get the point. Christina taught me that life is precious and tomorrow is not guaranteed–and they make it about race? I, seriously, don't want to spend the rest of my life paying off a loan that will go from 45k to +100k, and so I decided that I'm done with college. I’m currently in the process of dropping out because I’m sad and I don’t feel that the system is doing enough when they make “social justice” about race and still fall short on addressing the issue. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life paying off a student loan that I can’t afford if I might be the next victim–because I’m Asian? “Anti-racism” is not enough. Something needs to change and even “social justice” isn’t exactly “it.”
Unpopular Opinion
"Anti-racism" needs to include Stop Asian Hate &
"Social Justice" needs to address student debt
That's it. That's the opinion. If a university's "anti-racism" task force does not address violence against Asian Americans and their "social justice" initiative does not address the crippling student debt crisis, I cannot afford to attend there.
Here's an informative video on why I'm cutting my education short. Life is precious and tomorrow is not guaranteed. I don't want to spend the rest of my life paying off a loan that will go from 45k to +100k, and so I'm done with college.
Here's an informative video on why I'm cutting my education short. Life is precious and tomorrow is not guaranteed. I don't want to spend the rest of my life paying off a loan that will go from 45k to +100k, and so I'm done with college.
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Thanks Jake Tran for helping me wreck my life
Chapter Ten
I'm Done With College
I had no idea that I would start and end my blog like this. Why couldn't I be subtle? Write quietly? Save the effort? Why did I just go through all the trouble of going to graduate school? It's because just like anyone else, God has a will and a purpose for my life, or at least I sure hope that He does. This initial call to write was good, and if attending graduate school and starting a blog just to find my voice, stand up for my beliefs, and to drop out to make my point was His purpose for me, wow. That sure surprised me too! If I just wrote and preached about faith, that wouldn't communicate as well as sharing the grace of my mental breakdown (aka, living boldly by faith and standing up for my beliefs in which I feel like I'm the only sane person left).
Again, I firmly believe that "anti-racism" should include efforts to stand up against the recent violence towards Asian Americans, especially if the university rescheduled an "anti-racism" meeting because of Lunar New Year. Like how could you celebrate Asian culture but not stand up for it? And I also believe that making "social justice" about race, gender, and orientation is not the best approach to celebrate or teach diversity. For example, the school's designated "anti-racism" task force organizes student groups called the "BIPOC affinity group" and the "white allyship group" (which was previously called the "white-identifying affinity group"). These two groups were scheduled to meet at the same day and time, but via different Zoom links, and separating students on the basis of race sure seems like racism to me. But what would I really know? I dropped out.
I'm not against "anti-racism" or "social justice," but I now know that this particular school clearly was not the right fit for me, respectively. I've raised my concerns about the university's approach to "anti-racism" privately, I wrote an article to express how strongly I feel about why "anti-racism" needs to include Stop Asian Hate, turned it in with my last homework packet, and attached it when I submitted my request to withdraw. Mind you, I'm low key bipolar, and so the high part of me is like THAT WAS THE MOST BADASS WAY TO STAND UP FOR YOUR BELIEFS AND DROP OUT OF COLLEGE EVER, while the low side of me is wondering what's freaking wrong with me. This has all been so upsetting, and when I reached out to some close family and friends, they reminded me that my thoughts and feelings are valid. My concerns are valid even when the systems of groupthink try to make me feel otherwise.
God would also have me be the writer and editor of the MFA writing department's newsletter this semester, and so I wrote my final newsletter on my way out. This one included a big announcement about the department's decision to merge writing programs with the university's other campus, an exclusive interview with the Program Director at my campus, student shoutouts and praise reports, a call for submissions to the student symposium on the topics of: diversity, equity, and inclusion, and a note from the editor because I wanted to say bye to my classmates and friends who might wonder what happened to me. This was going to be an interesting newsletter, but needless to say that my final newsletter was not approved to be published and I am now relieved of my duties. If anyone really cared to check, they can find this on my blog, and I'm including this only because it helped me put what I'm going through into words.
Again, I firmly believe that "anti-racism" should include efforts to stand up against the recent violence towards Asian Americans, especially if the university rescheduled an "anti-racism" meeting because of Lunar New Year. Like how could you celebrate Asian culture but not stand up for it? And I also believe that making "social justice" about race, gender, and orientation is not the best approach to celebrate or teach diversity. For example, the school's designated "anti-racism" task force organizes student groups called the "BIPOC affinity group" and the "white allyship group" (which was previously called the "white-identifying affinity group"). These two groups were scheduled to meet at the same day and time, but via different Zoom links, and separating students on the basis of race sure seems like racism to me. But what would I really know? I dropped out.
I'm not against "anti-racism" or "social justice," but I now know that this particular school clearly was not the right fit for me, respectively. I've raised my concerns about the university's approach to "anti-racism" privately, I wrote an article to express how strongly I feel about why "anti-racism" needs to include Stop Asian Hate, turned it in with my last homework packet, and attached it when I submitted my request to withdraw. Mind you, I'm low key bipolar, and so the high part of me is like THAT WAS THE MOST BADASS WAY TO STAND UP FOR YOUR BELIEFS AND DROP OUT OF COLLEGE EVER, while the low side of me is wondering what's freaking wrong with me. This has all been so upsetting, and when I reached out to some close family and friends, they reminded me that my thoughts and feelings are valid. My concerns are valid even when the systems of groupthink try to make me feel otherwise.
God would also have me be the writer and editor of the MFA writing department's newsletter this semester, and so I wrote my final newsletter on my way out. This one included a big announcement about the department's decision to merge writing programs with the university's other campus, an exclusive interview with the Program Director at my campus, student shoutouts and praise reports, a call for submissions to the student symposium on the topics of: diversity, equity, and inclusion, and a note from the editor because I wanted to say bye to my classmates and friends who might wonder what happened to me. This was going to be an interesting newsletter, but needless to say that my final newsletter was not approved to be published and I am now relieved of my duties. If anyone really cared to check, they can find this on my blog, and I'm including this only because it helped me put what I'm going through into words.
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Hello and thank you for taking the time to read this month's MFA Citizen. While I have your attention, I'd like to say thanks and farewell to my classmates because I am cutting my education short to stand up for what I believe in, even when it's the harder thing to do. [The] University promotes "anti-racism" and "social justice," but I firmly believe that its idea of "anti-racism" needs to stand up against the rising violence against Asian Americans and that "social justice" needs to address the reality of paying back student loans. I don't believe that making "social justice" all about race, gender and orientation is the best approach to celebrate or teach diversity, and group names like "BIPOC Affinity" and "White Allyship" that are organized by the university's "anti-racism" efforts are discouraging and don't actually address real complex social issues, like student debt. It's also discouraging to feel like my concerns have not been taken seriously. I've raised valid concerns privately as an enrolled student, but because my concerns have not been better addressed, I am dropping out of college to stand up for my beliefs. If I'm told by society that I'm likely to become the next victim of a hate crime because of my race, but my university (which preaches "anti-racism" and "social justice") cannot even address the issue or at least pretend to be an "ally," then the university has fallen short of its intended mission and I cannot spend the rest of my life paying back this student loan. Best of luck to you all on your writing endeavors. Kindly, |
Of course, there was the polite possibility of returning after a gap year, but after what I experienced, I can’t. It makes me sad. I shared my concerns in my request to withdraw and my student status was quietly changed when I checked the next day with financial aid, but I didn’t even receive an email notification from student services about my enrollment status until after I politely brought up the fact to the financial aid office. So I was seen but ignored. Then, I received a copy and paste email about my withdrawal from the student registrar and the financial aid office sent me a packet for paying off student loans, and I felt like my concerns were overlooked. When I talked to the Program Director about my situation, he understood, but to the rest of the administration, I felt an awkward silence. I felt marginalized for bringing up valid concerns about the need to include Stop Asian Hate in the school’s “anti-racism” efforts, and I felt so strongly about it that I was willing to leave.
Regardless, I was there for less than a year and was still left with a very large bill, and there’s no way I can afford to return. I felt like a sucker with hopes and dreams who just got ripped off, and that was so disappointing. If I stayed for the entire program, that amount would have doubled and more, and after my underwhelming exit, I wonder if it was worth it. I have nothing against the writing department, but I firmly believe that “anti-racism” needs to include Stop Asian Hate and “social justice” needs to address student debt, and I’m in a painfully awkward situation for standing up for my beliefs. What happened to allyship? All it takes is for one friend to stand up for you. To anyone who wants to or is going to continue their higher education, my advice would be to watch Jake Tran’s video about student debt and evaluate your own financial situation and career goals before enrolling in a university. Don't just worry about it later, but evaluate the reality of your present situation. I just went through that so that some of you won’t ever have to, and what a learning experience that was.
I have: miso, 1/2 red cabbage, onions, banana peels I didn't want stinking the trash, oat milk
This is either: sad, another vegan health fad, or the avatar state (onion banana juice, anyone?)
This is either: sad, another vegan health fad, or the avatar state (onion banana juice, anyone?)
Unpopular Opinion
In Defense of Neil Young
This might be the most unpopular opinion ever. Everyone's standing up for Joe Rogan as a symbol of free speech and no censorship, but I'd like to give Neil Young some credit for having the nerve to stand up against misinformation and what everyone else is doing. Here's a breakdown of the situation: After several covid-related interviews on his podcast, Joe Rogan was accused by medical experts and the mainstream media for spreading misinformation. Then Neil Young left Spotify. Rogan addressed this on Instagram. Spotify hung in there for Rogan. A video compilation of Rogan saying the N-word later emerged on the internet. Rogan apologized for this on Instagram. Rumble made Joe an offer to move his podcast to their platform. Rogan did not accept the offer and hung in there for Spotify. Then Spotify and Rogan removed A LOT of his podcasts. There's certainly more, but that's a good wiff of it.
I've listened to a number of good episodes of the Joe Rogan Experience, but definitely not all of them, and for three hours each? Some of the conversations are really interesting, like with Yeonmi Park, Bob Lazar, and Tony Hawk to name a few, while others are more on the anything-goes side of what you'd call interesting, like Adam Curry, Elon Musk, and Kanye West. Yes, I listened to the entire three hour Kanye episode right around election time and the media will not even acknowledge how that conversation could have possibly swayed the election (just kidding). It's not mainstream media coverage, but conversations that allow us to really talk about important issues. The mainstream media presented and hyped up two candidates, but it's good that we also have alternative forms of media, like Joe Rogan's podcast, where less popular ideas can be discussed, whether you agree with Kanye or not. It was interesting.
So when the media went after Joe Rogan and criticized him for spreading misinformation on his podcast, I wanted to support Rogan because I see that these conversations are good to discuss important issues, plus, the mainstream media hates Dr. Robert Malone and they're putting all the heat on Joe Rogan. To anyone who doesn't listen to Joe Rogan or use Spotify, all they'll see are the mainstream media headlines and make the connection between Rogan and misinformation, but Rogan goes farther than any other podcaster to have conversations that challenge what's conventionally accepted about the mask and vaccine mandates, and anyone who really listens to him can appreciate his boldness in that way. Rogan brings attention to the fact that what was once labeled misinformation is being talked about openly by public health officials, like the mask mandates, where at first we were told not to wear masks and then to double mask or you don't have to wear a mask if you're vaccinated, and so on.
When it comes to Joe Rogan vs. the mainstream media, I want to support free speech and no censorship, but once Neil Young made his exit from Spotify, I see his point. Yes. Free speech is important, but information, especially highly sensitive information about critical health issues, should be communicated with more responsibility. Rogan has apologized and has taken responsibility for this situation, but Young's actions has left a lasting impression on what it means to take a stand for your beliefs. According to The Rolling Stone, Neil Young wrote in a letter that, “'I want you to let Spotify know immediately TODAY that I want all my music off their platform,' he continued. 'They can have [Joe] Rogan or Young. Not both.' Young is referencing the steady stream of misinformation about vaccines that Joe Rogan has peddled on The Joe Rogan Experience. Last month, 270 doctors, physicians, and science educators signed an open letter asking Spotify to stop spreading Rogan’s baseless claims" (The Rolling Stone).
Zero Hedge later reported that, "One day after Spotify CEO Daniel Ek penned a memo to Spotify employees explaining that 'silencing Joe Rogan' isn't the answer, musician Neil Young hit back with another open letter of his own, this one urging Spotify employees to quit over the platform's spreading of 'misinformation'...Speaking to Spotify employees, Young said: 'I say Daniel Ek is your big problem - not Joe Rogan. Get out of that place before it eats up your soul. The only goals stated by Ek are numbers, not art, not creativity.' He also encouraged musicians and other artists to take their content elsewhere, while asking consumers to find something better to support 'with their monthly checks'" (Zero Hedge). That's a lot to unpack. When Young said, "before it eats up your soul," it really made me wonder what the cost of being on social media (or in college) is because I've kind of felt this way for a while.
I'm not against Joe Rogan or Spotify in writing this opinion, but in defense of Neil Young, I also want to take a bold stance for what I believe in and leave school if I must. Young makes a good point about art over the numbers. Young also said, "To the musicians and creators in this world, I say this: You must be able to find a better place than Spotify to be the home of your art" (Zero Hedge). Although I really liked making playlists on Spotify, right now, I seriously feel like I need to unplug for a while and meditate or something. I'll take a break and miss some podcasts, but contrary to popular belief, there are other ways to stay informed besides following Joe Rogan on Instagram and Spotify, so I think I'll be okay. But, if I ever got a chance to ask Joe Rogan something, someday, I guess I'd want to ask him how's his spiritual life, and that could be another interesting conversation.
I've listened to a number of good episodes of the Joe Rogan Experience, but definitely not all of them, and for three hours each? Some of the conversations are really interesting, like with Yeonmi Park, Bob Lazar, and Tony Hawk to name a few, while others are more on the anything-goes side of what you'd call interesting, like Adam Curry, Elon Musk, and Kanye West. Yes, I listened to the entire three hour Kanye episode right around election time and the media will not even acknowledge how that conversation could have possibly swayed the election (just kidding). It's not mainstream media coverage, but conversations that allow us to really talk about important issues. The mainstream media presented and hyped up two candidates, but it's good that we also have alternative forms of media, like Joe Rogan's podcast, where less popular ideas can be discussed, whether you agree with Kanye or not. It was interesting.
So when the media went after Joe Rogan and criticized him for spreading misinformation on his podcast, I wanted to support Rogan because I see that these conversations are good to discuss important issues, plus, the mainstream media hates Dr. Robert Malone and they're putting all the heat on Joe Rogan. To anyone who doesn't listen to Joe Rogan or use Spotify, all they'll see are the mainstream media headlines and make the connection between Rogan and misinformation, but Rogan goes farther than any other podcaster to have conversations that challenge what's conventionally accepted about the mask and vaccine mandates, and anyone who really listens to him can appreciate his boldness in that way. Rogan brings attention to the fact that what was once labeled misinformation is being talked about openly by public health officials, like the mask mandates, where at first we were told not to wear masks and then to double mask or you don't have to wear a mask if you're vaccinated, and so on.
When it comes to Joe Rogan vs. the mainstream media, I want to support free speech and no censorship, but once Neil Young made his exit from Spotify, I see his point. Yes. Free speech is important, but information, especially highly sensitive information about critical health issues, should be communicated with more responsibility. Rogan has apologized and has taken responsibility for this situation, but Young's actions has left a lasting impression on what it means to take a stand for your beliefs. According to The Rolling Stone, Neil Young wrote in a letter that, “'I want you to let Spotify know immediately TODAY that I want all my music off their platform,' he continued. 'They can have [Joe] Rogan or Young. Not both.' Young is referencing the steady stream of misinformation about vaccines that Joe Rogan has peddled on The Joe Rogan Experience. Last month, 270 doctors, physicians, and science educators signed an open letter asking Spotify to stop spreading Rogan’s baseless claims" (The Rolling Stone).
Zero Hedge later reported that, "One day after Spotify CEO Daniel Ek penned a memo to Spotify employees explaining that 'silencing Joe Rogan' isn't the answer, musician Neil Young hit back with another open letter of his own, this one urging Spotify employees to quit over the platform's spreading of 'misinformation'...Speaking to Spotify employees, Young said: 'I say Daniel Ek is your big problem - not Joe Rogan. Get out of that place before it eats up your soul. The only goals stated by Ek are numbers, not art, not creativity.' He also encouraged musicians and other artists to take their content elsewhere, while asking consumers to find something better to support 'with their monthly checks'" (Zero Hedge). That's a lot to unpack. When Young said, "before it eats up your soul," it really made me wonder what the cost of being on social media (or in college) is because I've kind of felt this way for a while.
I'm not against Joe Rogan or Spotify in writing this opinion, but in defense of Neil Young, I also want to take a bold stance for what I believe in and leave school if I must. Young makes a good point about art over the numbers. Young also said, "To the musicians and creators in this world, I say this: You must be able to find a better place than Spotify to be the home of your art" (Zero Hedge). Although I really liked making playlists on Spotify, right now, I seriously feel like I need to unplug for a while and meditate or something. I'll take a break and miss some podcasts, but contrary to popular belief, there are other ways to stay informed besides following Joe Rogan on Instagram and Spotify, so I think I'll be okay. But, if I ever got a chance to ask Joe Rogan something, someday, I guess I'd want to ask him how's his spiritual life, and that could be another interesting conversation.
My little sister made me a vegan birthday cake and it was the sweetest birthday cake ever
<3
<3
Personal
Antisocial Media
Not that it's a big deal or that anyone even noticed, but I stopped checking Instagram and I don't know yet if this decision is temporary or permanent. To be honest, I didn't like how I felt being less liked than other girls, and I'm a really cool person if you get to know me. I tried not to let that get to me, but at a certain point, I really wondered why I'm close to invisible. At first, I liked sharing my art and life with my friends, but over time, I felt less sure about social media, especially after watching the new Matrix and The Social Dilemma. If the underlying purpose of social media is to observe my viewing patterns, influence my thoughts and perceptions, and to send me ads--I should just spend some time offline.
What really got to me was that after having the chillest birthday bonfire ever, the picture of my birthday cake got way less likes than someone else's selfie. It's so small that I don't like to admit that it even bugged me, but it did. I have the sweetest little sister ever who just made me a Sky Hasn't Fallen Yet birthday cake with so much love and being around my favorite people made me feel so incredibly special. The lesser number of likes that photo got should not distort the immeasurable value of the actual moment or who I am. I'm definitely overthinking it, which is a sure sign that it's best to stay offline. Not checking Instagram has been a silent protest of how I've felt for a while now, and if I ever log back in, I'll just be reminded of how irrelevant I feel (not am).
Not checking Instagram also puts me in an awkward position with wanting to share or sell art and to communicate with other people, but in defense of Neil Young, artists should be able to share their artwork elsewhere besides Spotify and Instagram. And so, for the meantime, there will be an "anti-social media" section on my website where I'll share some photos in an irregular and anti-social manner, and the best way to contact me will be through my contact page which will direct your message to my email. There were some good friends that I stayed in contact with via Instagram, but I hope that they will care to check my blog and reach out so that we can stay in touch. I even contemplated if I should write this last blog, but it's nice to say goodbye, especially to anyone who actually tuned in to my writer's journey.
That's it for now. You may reach out to me via my contact page and the best way to support me is just through moral support right now (unless you want to help me take care of my student loan debt and purchase my artwork). I just did the harder and more awkward thing to do by dropping out of college to stand up for what I believe in, and I don't know if that will come back to hurt me someday when I'm ready to publish. Please help me maintain my privacy by using my online alias, Sabaitide, and please don't mention my real name in anything because social media is a dangerous world and if you really wanted to know me, you could just be my friend. If my art and words have strongly resonated with you, I'd really appreciate it if you'd have my back on whatever comes next. Please help me spread the word and share my blog with your friends, family, famous distant relatives, and so on, and tag me #sabaitide #sabaitribe
What really got to me was that after having the chillest birthday bonfire ever, the picture of my birthday cake got way less likes than someone else's selfie. It's so small that I don't like to admit that it even bugged me, but it did. I have the sweetest little sister ever who just made me a Sky Hasn't Fallen Yet birthday cake with so much love and being around my favorite people made me feel so incredibly special. The lesser number of likes that photo got should not distort the immeasurable value of the actual moment or who I am. I'm definitely overthinking it, which is a sure sign that it's best to stay offline. Not checking Instagram has been a silent protest of how I've felt for a while now, and if I ever log back in, I'll just be reminded of how irrelevant I feel (not am).
Not checking Instagram also puts me in an awkward position with wanting to share or sell art and to communicate with other people, but in defense of Neil Young, artists should be able to share their artwork elsewhere besides Spotify and Instagram. And so, for the meantime, there will be an "anti-social media" section on my website where I'll share some photos in an irregular and anti-social manner, and the best way to contact me will be through my contact page which will direct your message to my email. There were some good friends that I stayed in contact with via Instagram, but I hope that they will care to check my blog and reach out so that we can stay in touch. I even contemplated if I should write this last blog, but it's nice to say goodbye, especially to anyone who actually tuned in to my writer's journey.
That's it for now. You may reach out to me via my contact page and the best way to support me is just through moral support right now (unless you want to help me take care of my student loan debt and purchase my artwork). I just did the harder and more awkward thing to do by dropping out of college to stand up for what I believe in, and I don't know if that will come back to hurt me someday when I'm ready to publish. Please help me maintain my privacy by using my online alias, Sabaitide, and please don't mention my real name in anything because social media is a dangerous world and if you really wanted to know me, you could just be my friend. If my art and words have strongly resonated with you, I'd really appreciate it if you'd have my back on whatever comes next. Please help me spread the word and share my blog with your friends, family, famous distant relatives, and so on, and tag me #sabaitide #sabaitribe
My artwork will be on display until the end of April at the Art From Scrap gallery
Thank you so much Art From Scrap and Explore Ecology!
I sold (or am holding) four paintings and am available for art commissions
Thank you so much Art From Scrap and Explore Ecology!
I sold (or am holding) four paintings and am available for art commissions
New Addition
Resources
I added a new page if you or someone you know needs to find some helpful mental health resources. I'll keep adding to this list occasionally, but please reach out to me if you'd like to add one to this list! Recent additions are Drug Watch's Mental Illness Guide and Cutter Law's Ride Sharing Sexual Assault Safety Guide.
Afghanistan Relief
Asian Mental Health Collective
Asian Mental Health Project
Brown Girl Therapy
Brown Therapist Network
Crisis Text Line (Text HOME to 741-741)
Cutter Law - Ride Sharing Sexual Assault Safety Guide
Drug Watch - Managing Stress
Drug Watch - Mental Illness Guide
Know the Signs
Mental Health America
Mental Health First Aid
National Alliance on Mental Illness (1-800-950-6264)
National Sexual Assault Hotline (1-800-656-4673)
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-8255)
National Empowerment Center
National Institute if Mental Health
OK2Talk
Painted Brain
Psych2Go - Videos on Mental Health
South Asian Therapists
Start Your Recovery
Therapist Aid
TIME - How to Help Ukraine People
UNICEF
United Help Ukraine
USA for UNHCR
Voices of Children
320 Changes Direction
7 Cups of Tea
Asian Mental Health Collective
Asian Mental Health Project
Brown Girl Therapy
Brown Therapist Network
Crisis Text Line (Text HOME to 741-741)
Cutter Law - Ride Sharing Sexual Assault Safety Guide
Drug Watch - Managing Stress
Drug Watch - Mental Illness Guide
Know the Signs
Mental Health America
Mental Health First Aid
National Alliance on Mental Illness (1-800-950-6264)
National Sexual Assault Hotline (1-800-656-4673)
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-8255)
National Empowerment Center
National Institute if Mental Health
OK2Talk
Painted Brain
Psych2Go - Videos on Mental Health
South Asian Therapists
Start Your Recovery
Therapist Aid
TIME - How to Help Ukraine People
UNICEF
United Help Ukraine
USA for UNHCR
Voices of Children
320 Changes Direction
7 Cups of Tea
Gratitude
To End on a Happy Note
Something needs to change and even “social justice” isn’t exactly “it.” But who am I to say? If I really want to change the world, I should change myself first, but at the same time, it won’t work if I change in the way to become just like the world. It’s been on my conscience lately to pursue the values of God, not the values of the world, and so when it came to my moral conviction about college, I picked God’s way even if dropping out of college is not the best professional thing to do. On the other hand, if I suppressed my moral convictions, staying in college would not be the best financial thing to do. The reality is that student debt is so ridiculous that even Buddha would laugh. The best advice is to do what you feel is the right thing to do.
I don’t have to be sorry about how I feel, and so this is an unapologetic piece of my mind because no one reads my blog anyway. The plotline of my blog was that I was going to write a book, but I think it was Kanye who once said that rather than saying you’ll do something, you should just do it. I write my blog one chapter at a time like I'm going to write a book, and now I strongly feel like I should let it stand at ten chapters. Looks like I was writing a book all this time! Like if dropping an art show was the greatest plot twist ever and dropping out of college was the climax of my writer's journey, I seriously cannot top that or write anything better. Now I'm going to live some life, write some poetry, probably find a second part-time job, and turn my blog into a book with an afterward after giving this an appropriate amount of time to reflect. Then, maybe, I’ll finally write that science fiction novel. It's been a real work in progress.
Yes, we can still be friends, but I just need to chill for a while #sabaitide #sabaitribe
I don’t have to be sorry about how I feel, and so this is an unapologetic piece of my mind because no one reads my blog anyway. The plotline of my blog was that I was going to write a book, but I think it was Kanye who once said that rather than saying you’ll do something, you should just do it. I write my blog one chapter at a time like I'm going to write a book, and now I strongly feel like I should let it stand at ten chapters. Looks like I was writing a book all this time! Like if dropping an art show was the greatest plot twist ever and dropping out of college was the climax of my writer's journey, I seriously cannot top that or write anything better. Now I'm going to live some life, write some poetry, probably find a second part-time job, and turn my blog into a book with an afterward after giving this an appropriate amount of time to reflect. Then, maybe, I’ll finally write that science fiction novel. It's been a real work in progress.
Yes, we can still be friends, but I just need to chill for a while #sabaitide #sabaitribe
On Another Wavelength
Santa Barbara born and Ventura raised, Sabaitide is an emerging Asian American artist and writer who strives to understand her eastern roots in Buddhism and her western perspective as a Christian to get through the motions of an extra ordinary life. Sabaitide is continuing to expand her art and writing portfolio as she captures the ups and downs of the creative process on her blog www.sabaitide.com.
@sabaitide
@sabaitide